If you wish to file for divorce, there are several avenues you can pursue to protect your children from any potential harm your wife may cause.
First, you can seek a parenting plan awarding you primary residential care, and giving your wife only supervised visits until she completes a drug and alcohol assessment (and all associated treatment). If your wife is making allegations that you have an anger problem, she may request that you complete an anger management course or something of the like.
Second, you can ask the court to appoint a Guardian ad Litem or Parenting Investigator. This is a person who will interview the parents and the children, as well as collateral contacts, and make a recommendation to the court as to what parenting plan is in the best interest of the children.
If you and your wife are both making allegations that the other is a bad parent or may be a potential danger to the children, the GAL or Parenting Investigator may be the voice of reason to the court.
You are facing a difficult situation and I recommend you seek the assistance of an attorney as soon as you can.
Nicole M. Bolan, Attorney at Law
Blado Kiger Bolan, Tacoma, Wash.